Jokes

A Microsoft Christmas

NORTH POLE (API) - MICROSOFT announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's summer estate…

A lesson in ebonics

A sixth grade class is doing some spelling drills. The teacher asks Tommy if he can spell 'before.' He stands up and says, "Before, B-E-P-H-O-R."The teacher…

A good student

It was the first day of school and a new student named Martinez, the son of a Mexican restaurateur, entered the fourth grade. The teacher said,…

A fortunate coincidence

John: "I'm glad you named me John."Mother: "Why?"John: "Because that's what all the kids at school callme."

A first-grade teacher was overseeing her students

A first-grade teacher was overseeing her students as they experimented with their desk computers. One boy sat staring at the screen, unsure how to get the…

A first-grade class is having a game of Name That Animal.

A first-grade class is having a game of Name That Animal.The teacher held up a picture of a cat."What animal is this?" she asked. "A cat!"…

A fifth grader looked downcast, so her teacher asked

A fifth grader looked downcast, so her teacher asked, "What's theproblem, Carol? I hope it's not homework again.""Well, uh, yes, it is." replied Carol. "I was…

A clear moral

One day at the end of class little Billy's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of…

Ask your question

One day at a trial, an eminent psychologist was called to testify. A severe, no-nonsense professional, she sat down in the witness chair, unaware that its…

Arguing effectively

How to Argue Effectively I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People…

Advice from lawyers

George and Lenny decide to cross North America in a hot air balloon. However, neither were particularly experienced balloonists, and Lenny's mind quickly drifted from navigation…

Actual stupid questions asked

The below excerpts appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune. They were taken from real court records.Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in…

A man and his Alligator

A man and his alligator walk into a bar and the man asks, "Does this bar serve lawyers?""Of course we do," replied the bartender."Great," said the…

A love for material goods

A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not…

A cold winter night

Lorenzo Dow, an evangelist of the last century, was on a preaching tour when he came to a small town one cold winter's night.He entered the…