Two ropes walk in to a bar, one rope calls the bartender and says "Barkeep, let me get a couple of beers." The bartender says "I'm…

A guy walks into a bar and asks for 13 margaritas. The bartender abruptly replies, "Wow sir, that sure is a lot, whats the occasion?"

With all the pirates hijacking ships for ransom and stuff like that going on in the news, I figured we'd throw out a pirate joke for…

After a heavy night of drinking at the local bar, a drunk stumbles into a Catholic church and slowly makes his way into the confessional booth.…

College MajorsSuppose you have a professor hold up two apples and asks a class "How many objects am I holding?" you would probably get different…

1. In an imaginary world a kiss would signify the end of sexual tension and the beginning of a relationship. In college, it means somebody is…

Q: How many Davidson students does it take to change a light bulb?A: Four - one to change a bulb, and three to write up…

"Ok class" said the teacher of a 2nd grade class "todays word is definately can anyone use it in a sentance" Betty raised her hand "the…

The bear looks at the rabbit and says,"Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?"The rabbits says,"No..."So the bear wipes his…

Two robins were lying on their backs, basking in the sun. A mama cat and her kitten were walking by.The kitten complained, "Mama, I'm sooo…

Q: What do you do when a pig has a heartatack?A: You call an hambulance!

Q) What do you call a dog with no legs?A) It doesn't matter, he won't come!

A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter.Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does…

A man recently bought a bull elephant for 50 grand. He decided to make big bucks out of the elephant. He trained the elephant not to…

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat…