Jokes

90 Year Old Wanker

What do you call a 90-year-old man who can still masturbate?Miracle whip!

Do You Pray Before Eating?

The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?""No sir," Little Johnny replies, "I don't have to, my…

Things Not To Say During Childbirth

Gosh, you're lucky. I sure wish men could experience the miracle of childbirth.Do you think the baby will come before Monday Night Football starts?I…

Christmas Present

It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. The pastor of the church was looking over the cradle when he noticed that…

Where is God?

A couple had two little boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that, if…

A kindergartner was practicing spelling

A kindergartner was practicing spelling with magnetic letters on the refrigerator: cat, dog, dad, and mom had been proudly displayed for all to see.One morning…

School Daze

It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.The florist's son handed her a gift.…

An Atheist

A young woman teacher with obvious liberal tendencies explains to her class of small children that she is an atheist. She asks her class if they…

Working on the Road

A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his…

Do This While Driving

Strange and silly things to do while driving. We do not advise doing any of the below "things to do while driving", as all driving should…

A Man Was Driving Along

A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but…

New Airbag In Detroit

With third-quarter sales sluggish and its share of the domestic market down 11 percent since 1993, General Motors unveiled a new instant-win airbag contest Monday. The…

Two Men Got Out

Two men got out of their cars after they collided at an intersection. One took a flask from his pocket and said to the other, "Here,…

I Own The Fastest Car

A man goes out and buys the best car available in the US or Europe, a 2001 Turbo BeepBeep. It is the best and most expensive…

The During Messy Divoce

A couple in the middle of a messy divorce case find themselves in court battling over custody of little Johnny, their only child. In order to…