Jokes
Idiot Contest
A woman was letting her husband have it with just a touch more venom than usual, saying, 'You're an idiot. You have always been an idiot.…
Locked Car
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced…
The Stella Awards
The "Stella" awards rank up there with the Darwin awards. Stella Liebeck is the 81 year old lady who spilled coffee on herself and sued McDonalds.…
Sorry wrong number
One morning the phone rang at 3:00 a.m. in Jeff's house. He picked up the phone and a woman asked, "Is this 555-1111?""No, this is…
The Mistake Test
See if you can do this. Read each line aloud without making any mistakes. If you make a mistake you MUST start over or it won't…
Two Morons
After a ship sank in the ocean, three men ended up stranded in a lifeboat. They floated around for days without food or water. One afternoon…
Wife's Golf Shot
Anthill GolfingOnce there was a golfer whose drive landed on an anthill. Rather than move the ball, he decided to hit it where it lay.…
Wife's Golf Shot
Bob stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity. He waggled, looked up, looked down, waggled again, but didn't start his backswing.Finally his…
A golf club walks into a bar
A golf club walks into a local bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.The barman refuses to serve him. "Why not," asks…
The Blind Golfers
A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.Engineer: What's with these guys? We must have…
What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125
Q: What do you call a blonde golfer with an IQ of 125?A: A foursome.
Too Many Questions
Jill: I just don't understand the attraction golf holds for men.Mary: Tell me about it! I went golfing with my husband one time, and he…
What's your secret?
A gushy reporter told Jack Nicklaus, "You are spectacular, your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around the course.…
I'd move heaven and earth
Near the end of a particularly trying round of golf, during which the golfer had hit numerous fat shots, he said in frustration to his caddy,…
Finest Equipment
Morris had been playing golf for years, and he had the finest equipment, but his technique never improved a bit.As his friend watched, he teed…